765 ㅡ Your heart is made of gold and glass.

Remember what you are made of the next time you think you are bulletproof. You are white bone and silken flesh; your heart is made of gold and glass. Stop trying to make yourself indestructible—like any soft creature it is in your nature to break, like any soft creature it is in your nature to heal.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

764 ㅡ You are never really going to figure it out.

Here's what they don't tell you—you are never really going to figure it out. You are never going to figure out the world, or why the things that happened to you happened, or how to ensure that your future is faultless. You are never going to figure out how to perfect your existence, because it was never meant to be perfected. Instead, you will figure out how to move forward, day by day. You will figure out what kind of breakfast you like in the morning and what kind of people you want by your side. You will figure out the places that make your soul feel at home, and sometimes those places will be human beings. You will figure out what ignites your passion, the things that you could see yourself doing every single day for ten, or twenty, or thirty years. You will figure out how to say no and how to stand up for yourself. You will figure out how to forgive and let go. You will figure out exactly how you like to take your coffee. You will figure out how to walk away, how to heal. You will figure out how to live with yourself, how to be your own companion. You will figure out how to be kind to even the most broken parts of yourself. See, you will figure out how to embrace life. How to truly accept it as it comes.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

763 ㅡ I want to be proud of the way I loved

At the end of the day, I want to be proud of the way I loved, I want to be proud of the way I placed my heart into the hands of others. I want to be proud of the way I chose vulnerability, of the way I chose tenderness; how I never stopped choosing it no matter what my soul experienced at the hands of being the kind of human being who loved deeply in this world.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

762 ㅡ About finding a happiness that works for you.

Growth isn't this comfortable, miraculous thing. It can get ugly, it can get confusing. It's gritty, it's hard. It's difficult to confront yourself sometimes; it's difficult to be the person who does things differently, who doesn't settle. But it's the greatest gift you will ever give yourself. It will push you towards figuring out what your own personal version of happiness looks like; and when you grow on your own terms, when you figure out what actually matters to you, and when you carve out your own path, you live on your own terms. You love on your own terms. You become the person you have always wanted to be, rather than the person you were always told to be, and that is beautiful. Because when it comes down to it—life is about making yourself proud on your own terms. It's about finding a happiness that works for you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

761 ㅡ Where is the paradise that surges beyond love?

I will meet you with the holes of the sky, the untouched tunnels where dreamers stamp out the supernovas. I will meet you within the intensity of the sea, between the waves and the horizon—that small sliver of earth where feeling is preserved like a mounted butterfly in a glass case. Where is the paradise that surges beyond love? I will meet you there.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

760 ㅡ Someone who will take care of your soul.

Fall in love with someone who will take care of you. Fall in love with someone who will take care of your soul. Fall in love with someone who will take care of your mind, someone who will take care of your heart. Fall in love with someone who will take care of even the most chaotic parts of who you are.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

759 ㅡ To find your way back into your soul.

Maybe this is the season you are being challenged to make amends with your heart, to stand up for the vast ways in which it loves, and cares, and believes in the goodness of vulnerability, and expression, and being the person who softens even when the world is not gentle. Maybe right now you are getting a second chance—to trust in it, and to forgive yourself for giving it away to those who could not value it; but most importantly, maybe right now you are being called to protect it, to find your way back into your tenderness, to find your way back into your soul.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

758 ㅡ Sometimes, courage is a quiet fight.

Sometimes courage is a quiet fight, a dim softness within you, that flickers even on your darkest days and reminds you that you are strong, that you are growing—that there is hope.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

757 ㅡ The courage to do things differently.

I hope you have the courage to do things differently, to be the kind of person who takes the risk, to be the kind of person who leads with their heart and shows up in their life with a ruthless dedication to learning and growing and enjoying the hell out of their moments here.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

756 ㅡ Love cannot be manufactured or destroyed.

The beautiful thing about love is that it cannot be manufactured or destroyed. It is carnal, it is raw; it cannot be discovered where it does not exist, it cannot be concealed where it thrives. Use this to your advantage. If you do not feel it where you lay, I hope you have the strength to walk away, but if you do, I hope you have the strength to fight.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

755 ㅡ You will always be good enough for them.

Don't ever forget that the right people will choose you, they will see you, they will dive into the depth of you, and you will never have to force those connections. You will always be good enough for them. Anything else is not for you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

754 ㅡ Words, too simple to express our deep emotions.

Introverts have very small social circles, and it takes a lot for us to let people in. We may not always talk about our feelings, because words are too simple to express our deep emotions, but if we have made you a part of our life, know that we care for you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

753 ㅡ You're investing in a life that works for you.

I promise that when you start to invest in both your mind and your body, you are also investing in your happiness, your empowerment, and your confidence, because you are investing in a life that works for you, and that gives back to you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

752 ㅡ You don't owe anyone an apology.

The people in your life who truly matter will never admonish you for changing. Instead, they will build you up; they will inspire and motivate you. They will understand that you are striving to be more for yourself, and they will admire you for that; because at the end of the day, change is something you should never be ashamed of. You don't owe anyone an apology for changing. You don't owe anyone an apology for being different than you were a year ago, for wanting new things.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

751 ㅡ Let love and opportunity move through you.

I hope you have the courage to let love and opportunity move through you like rain. To not grip, or seek to change it, to not ask people or circumstances to be more than they can be for you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

750 ㅡ Do you understand what you are made of?

Do you understand what you are made of? The very stars combust in the night sky with the same atoms that make up your mind. Can you feel that?

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

749 ㅡ Lose yourself in books, in art.

Lose yourself in books, in art, in the haze of new horizons. Lose yourself in curiosity, in knowledge, in passion. Lose yourself in feeling it all; lose yourself in the world, in the stories and the lessons it has to teach you, but never lose yourself in love; never lose yourself in another person. You are your own home—please don't ever forget that.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

748 ㅡ It is okay to take your time.

It is okay to take your time. We live in a generation that romanticizes moving forward as quickly as possible when it comes to careers and our futures and our success within them. But there is no point in rushing quickly towards a life that will not inspire you or fulfill you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

747 ㅡ Only with the heart that one can see rightly.

And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: it is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

746 ㅡ It's easy to love someone when they're perfect.

It is easy to love someone when they are perfect, when they are soft and light, when they are filled with hope and happiness. But loving someone when they are wearing their flaws like an apology, when they are breaking down, or when they are carrying hurt within them—that is when it means the most. That is when you must show up for them.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

745 ㅡ How beautiful love will be when it stays.

If you were capable of feeling so much towards those who may not have always been gentle with your heart, imagine how beautiful love will be when it is right—imagine how beautiful love will be when it stays.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

744 ㅡ You have to chase the things that ignite you.

You have to chase the things that ignite you. You have to do the things that bring you joy. You have to surround yourself with the people who bring you back home to yourself, with the people who respect you and embrace you in ways that make you feel like you are worthy and accepted and loved.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

743 ㅡ The courage to believe goodness still exists.

I hope you have the courage to believe that goodness still exists, that there are those who have the capacity to love the way you do, that there are those who will see you and grow you and teach you more about the world.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

742 ㅡ You get to be your own validation.

All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don't ever forget that.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

741 ㅡ Nourish the softness inside of you.

Remind yourself that you deserve to take all of the energy you put out into the world and invest it back into yourself from time to time. That you are worthy of the love you keep giving to everyone else. Remind yourself that you don't always have to be strong, that you don't always have to be the fixer. You can be human; you can ask for help. You can take a step back to nourish the softness inside of you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

740 ㅡ You're going to be so glad that you kept going.

Trust me when I say that one day it's going to hit you—that you woke up happy, that you're smiling for no reason, that your hands aren't shaking anymore. One day, you're going to remember what it was like to be you a year ago, or three years ago, or even a week ago, and you're going to be so glad that you fought. You're going to be so glad that you kept going.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

739 ㅡ Some of the kindest souls I know.

Some of the kindest souls I know have lived in a world that was not so kind to them. Some of the best human beings I know have been through so much at the hands of others, and they still love deeply; they still care. Sometimes, it's the people who have been hurt the most who refuse to be hardened in this world, because they would never want to make another person feel the same way they felt. If that isn't something to be in awe of, I don't know what is.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

738 ㅡ ‘tis the season for unapologetic self-care.

‘tis the season for love, kindness, joy, and unapologetic self-care.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

737 ㅡ Shape your heart, bigger this time.

Shape your spine, stronger this time. Shape your heart, bigger this time. Shape your eyes, capable of seeing more than you ever imagined. Shape your mouth; give it the capacity to say all of the words you never allowed yourself to say. begin again.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

736 ㅡ Somewhere between the horizon and the sea.

Somewhere, tucked away in the vastness of it all, hidden between the horizon and the sea, there exists a world where you are loving the one that got away, where the words you never allowed yourself to say flow freely between your teeth. There exists a realm where you did things differently—where you choose the other path. Maybe you are happier there, though that is not the point, for maybe you aren't. Maybe, just maybe, despite circumstances, despite regret, you are exactly where you need to be. The only thing stopping you from realizing that is the way you whisper what if.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

735 ㅡ Your body is a sanctuary.

Your body is a sanctuary, a place where love and grief flow like crashing rapids against your spine. It is time to take your hands off of your thighs and your gaze off of the marks that adorn your hips like ornaments. The universe gave up celestial pieces of itself to sculpt you. It is time to honor that.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

734 ㅡ You have it within you to be soft.

You do not always have to be fire, do not always have to burn those who come too close. Remember—you are seventy percent water; you have it within you to be soft.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

733 ㅡ Set it on fire.

If the world does not understand the way you burn, do not hide yourself away. Instead, set it on fire. Show them what you can do with all of that hope inside of you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

732 ㅡ Caring for the people you love is great.

Caring for the people you love is great, but you've got to remember to take care of yourself, too. Only when you are well, you can share your energy with someone else.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

731 ㅡ Find magic in the little things.

Find magic in the little things, and the big things you always expected will start to show up.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

730 ㅡ Speak highly of yourself, speak with love.

Here's a reminder to speak kindly to yourself. Speak highly of yourself, speak with love, speak the words you'll comfort your friend with, and speak the words when you're giggling with a child. Acknowledge yourself with all the love you can give, you deserve to.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

729 ㅡ You are made up of thorns and roses.

You are made up of thorns and roses, hurricanes and breezes. You are valiant, even when tears are rolling down your cheeks. There is strength in vulnerability. never forget your power.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

728 ㅡ Be kind.

Be kind. Be kind to the people around you, be kind to the stranger who might've been having a bad day, be kind to your friends, be kind to your family. Be kind to yourself. Sending warm hugs and lots of love your way.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

727 ㅡ Let's hold space for our hearts.

As we go on this journey of unlearning and relearning how to deal with our emotions, let us remind ourselves to be kind to us through the times where we don't know how to deal with our emotions. Le'ts unpack slowly. Let's hold space for our hearts. You're doing great.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

726 ㅡ Beauty is in your soul.

Beauty is in the way you hold yourself. It's how you treat people. The way you love. It's self acceptance. Beauty is in your soul.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

725 ㅡ Hard work will pay off.

Hard work will pay off. Maybe not right now, maybe not tomorrow, but all the heart, time, and effort you have dedicated into the work that you're doing will all add up. All the months and years that you've put in will lead you somewhere. I believe in you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

724 ㅡ Special, unique, the one and only.

You are beautiful. The way you brighten up when you get to talk about your favorite thing, when you giggle at the strangest occurrence, when your eyes catch light even on the darkest day, you are the most breathtaking creation. Special, unique, the one and only.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

723 ㅡ Feel the wind on your face

Sometimes it's necessary to reserve some time for you. Read your favorite book, sit on the grass, and feel the wind on your face, just relaxing. It's always good to take care of ourselves.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

752 ㅡ Finally understand why you had to wait so long.

When the time is right, you are going to fall in love with someone who will appreciate everything you stand for, who will compliment you in ways you never imagined. When the time is right, the love you have always been worthy of will flower within your life, and you will finally understand why you had to wait so long.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

722 ㅡ Slowly coming together to form better days.

The small pockets of peace I found every day is slowly coming together to form better days.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

721 ㅡ Healing comes in waves.

I was reminded today that healing comes in waves. So it's okay if today hurts a little more than yesterday. I'm holding onto you. Sending strength your way.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

720 ㅡ Every day may not be good.

Today I got reminded that every day may not be good, but there will always be a little bit of good in every day. I hope you're all taking good care of yourselves, and that your day was kind. I'm sending so much love your way.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

719 ㅡ One step at a time, I'm holding you.

When the storm comes in unexpectedly, it can leave behind debris, destruction, and too much pain. But remember that the sun will shine through again. The hurt it caused can be rebuilt slowly from within. Change is painful, but it will not be that way forever. One step at a time. I'm holding you, I promise.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

718 ㅡ Every heart is a garden.

Every heart is a garden, allow yourself to flourish.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

717 ㅡ I hope you will learn to love yourself fully one day.

I hope you will learn to love yourself fully one day. I hope you will be able to say thank you to compliments, not for the sake of it, but because you believe it. I hope you will be able to look in the mirror and see the true beauty that's shining from within you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

716 ㅡ We will make it out of the darkness together.

One moment you can feel like the happiest person on earth, then you can feel like you're thrown into the middle of the deep ocean the next. Feeling stranded, helpless. Life is happening and so unpredictable. But I always trust that everything happens for a reason. Where there is darkness, there shall always be light. Take heart, move forward a day at a time. An arrow is pulled back only to be propelled forward stronger. We will make it out of the darkness together, we will see the light at the end of this storm together. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

715 ㅡ Let go and allow ourselves the space to breathe

As hard as it seems—or maybe as simple as it sounds, sometimes the only thing we can remind ourselves to do is to let go and allow ourselves the space to breathe. Allow yourself space to release all the tension that you have been holding onto. Be it physically like unclenching your jaw and relaxing your shoulders, or your need for control over everything. It's all a work in progress of course, it's a process that we have to unlearn and re-navigate again. Sending all the love and strength your way, we are on this journey together. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

714 ㅡ You will crash, you will burn.

You will crash, you will burn. But you will also heal, and very much so grow. Don't let go of yourself, you're so extremely important, and so very loved.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

713 ㅡ People that are real and genuine with you.

I hope that you are always surrounded by people with your best interest at heart. I hope you will always be with people that are real and genuine with you. I hope you will always be reminded that you are loved.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

712 ㅡ You are the sun, the stars, the clouds.

You are the sun, the stars, the clouds, the wind, the rain, the storms, the spring. You are the seasons, the light, the dark, and everything else in between. You are everything incredible, everything invincible. You are loved. You are so loved.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

711 ㅡ I have learnt to love the sky.

I have learnt to love the sky, no matter rain or shine. I have learnt to love the sky, no matter cloudy or bare. I have learnt to love the sky in all its beauty and wonder, I hope that we will all be able to learn how to love ourselves just the same.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

710 ㅡ You are not alone, you are loved.

I hope that this can remind you, that even on days where you feel stuck in nowhere, when everyone feels too far away for some reason, you are not alone. You are loved, you are important, and you are always on someone's mind. Sending love and lots of warm hugs your way.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

709 ㅡ Thankful you're here in this space with me.

If there's anything I'd like you to know right now, it's that I'm so proud of you for who you are right at this very moment. You have come so far, and I'm so thankful you're here in this space with me.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

708 ㅡ Because you deserve love and light.

May this season be the one where you take care of yourself, take time to heal, and do the things that make you happy. May this season be one of self-care, where you put your well-being first before anything else, because you deserve love and light.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

707 ㅡ Moments of pain, heartbreak, and falls.

Growth. We are constantly going through cycles of growth. Moments of pain, heartbreak, and falls, will bring acceptance, understanding, and strength. There will be peace after the chaos. Please hang tight. Sending lots of warmth and love your way, take care of yourself.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

706 ㅡ When things happen all at once.

When things happen all at once and everything feels too overwhelming, please remember to take a small step back. Lay your tasks out, break them down, and take them on one small step at a time. You've got this! Sending love, good vibes, and strength your way.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

705 ㅡ You are allowed to romanticize life.

You are allowed to romanticize life. Every little stir of your coffee, every sip of your tea. The sounds of leaves and snow crunching under your shoes, and the way your breath curls through the air when it's cold. Life is beautiful, never forget.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

704 ㅡ If it's something that keeps your heart going.

If it's something that keeps your heart going, if it's something that you deeply treasure, if it's something that brings you happiness, if it's something so worth fighting for, hold on tight to it and never let it go.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

703 ㅡ Things that take a long time to acquire.

There are things that take a long time to acquire; friends, love.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

702 ㅡ You will discover that you have two hands.

As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands; one for helping yourself, the other for helping others.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

701 ㅡ Focus on living fully in the present.

If you want to be happy, do not dwell in the past, do not worry about the future, focus on living fully in the present.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

700 ㅡ You can even break ice with it.

A smile is a powerful weapon; you can even break ice with it.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

699 ㅡ Every flower is a soul blossoming in nature.

Every flower is a soul blossoming in nature.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

698 ㅡ One would end up with wings.

I believe that if one always looked at the skies, one would end up with wings.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

697 ㅡ Aim for the sky, but move slowly.

Aim for the sky, but move slowly, enjoying every step along the way. It is all those little steps, that makes the journey complete. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

696 ㅡ The best and most beautiful things.

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

695 ㅡ The sky takes on shades of orange.

The sky takes on shades of orange during sunrise and sunset, the colour that gives you hope that the sun will set only to rise again. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

694 ㅡ Clouds come floating into my life.

Clouds come floating into my life, no longer to carry rain or usher storm, but to add color to my sunset sky.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

693 ㅡ Life is the flower for which love is the honey.

Life is the flower for which love is the honey.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

692 ㅡ You will find that life is still worthwhile.

You will find that life is still worthwhile, if you just smile. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

691 ㅡ Always bring your own sunshine.

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

690 ㅡ Keep your face to the sun.

Keep your face to the sun and you will never see the shadows.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

689 ㅡ It's what you answer to.

It isn't what they call you, it's what you answer to.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

688 ㅡ The universe lovingly takes care of me.

I love myself for I am a beloved child of the universe, and the universe lovingly takes care of me now.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

687 ㅡ Stay close to people who feel like sunlight.

Stay close to people who feel like sunlight.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

686 ㅡ One fine day, you will look at me.

One fine day, you will look at me.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

685 ㅡ She is a source of happiness.

She is a source of happiness.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

684 ㅡ Let yourself remember to love again.

Don't ever allow yourself to forget how incredibly special you are, even for a single second. Without you, the world would not be as magnificent. Let yourself remember to love again, starting with you loving you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

683 ㅡ Be very very very gentle with yourself.

Be very very very gentle with yourself, because the world is very very very hard on you.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

682 ㅡ The more you love yourself.

The more you love yourself, the less nonsense you'll tolerate.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

681 ㅡ Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.

Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

680 ㅡ Every leaf speaks bliss to me.

Every leaf speaks bliss to me, fluttering from the autumn tree.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

679 ㅡ Infuse your life with action.

Infuse your life with action. Don't wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen yourself, right now, right down here on earth.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

678 ㅡ Because life is moving in a very positive way.

I am happy every day, because life is moving in a very positive way. 

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

677 ㅡ Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile.

Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

676 ㅡ If you smile when you are alone.

If you smile when you are alone, then you really mean it.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

675 ㅡ My life has been a roller coaster ride.

My life has been a roller coaster ride, but somehow I have always been able to land on my feet and still play the guitar.

Sincerely yours,

Senjakala.

674 ㅡ Jadilah kembang yang membuat pangling dunia.

Selamat berjuang kembali, Senjakala Merindu. Perjalananmu belum selesai. Jadilah kembang yang mampu membuat pangling dunia. Biarkan semangatmu bergelora.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

673 ㅡ Itu pun kalau diperkenankan semesta.

Kesabaran yang terus-menerus diuji di sini menjadi saksi bahwasanya Senjakala Merindu hendak mulai menanam kembang-kembang cantik di pekarangan rumahnya. Lebih baik lagi apabila ia bisa berubah menjadi sosok kembang jelita. Itu pun kalau diperkenankan semesta.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

672 ㅡ Membekas betul rasa bahagia di dalam dada.

Padahal hanya diminta menyelesaikan misi berupa menanam kembang dan menjawab pertanyaan, tetapi hadiah yang diterima mampu dikatakan sungguh luar biasa. Tak mungkin tak bungah, pasti membekas betul rasa bahagia di dalam dada.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

671 ㅡ Selangkah lebih dekat dengan diri.

Penantian panjang akhirnya membuahkan hasil yang sangat memuaskan. Selangkah lebih dekat sudah Senjakala Merindu dengan diri sendiri.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

670 ㅡ Bungah betul, kedua pipi bersemu merah.

“Aku menyayangimu, Surinala Melati,” bisik Senjakala Merindu penuh kesungguhan dalam desibel rendah. “Aku mencintaimu, Surinala Melati.” Kali kedua kalimat memang diucapkan dengan lebih lantang.

Bungah betul, kedua pipi langsung bersemu merah. Ah, seketika si bungsu merindukan kakaknya. Surinala Melati sekarang sedang apa, ya?

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

669 ㅡ Ini bukanlah respons sebal.

Dengus tipis hadir. Tenang, ini bukanlah respons sebal, melainkan sebuah respons baik dari perangai bebal milik Senjakala Merindu. Terlalu banyak sosok yang muncul di kepala berikut nama-nama mereka kala pertanyaan usai membekas di pikiran. Kendati demikian, agaknya satu nama keluar sebagai pemenang sekalinya dipikir ulang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

668 ㅡ Lekas memindai setiap aksara.

Hanya butuh beberapa menit bagi Senjakala Merindu untuk akhirnya menyelesaikan kegiatan. Oleh sebab itu, beralih kembali atensi untuk lekas memindai setiap aksara yang mengisi sepucuk surat terakhir.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

667 ㅡ Dengan gembira mengerjakan tanpa cela.

Tak terburu-buru kuasa menyentuh pot baru, tanah gembur, hingga pupuk yang dipercaya bisa mempercepat pertumbuhan kembang unik di dalam rumah kaca ini. Seakan hendak menikmati momen terakhir, Senjakala Merindu dengan gembira mengerjakan misi tanpa cela.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

666 ㅡ Bergegaslah figur mungil menuju destinasi.

Bergegaslah figur mungil dibawa bergerak menuju destinasi. Rumah kaca sudah menanti kehadiran sang bintang yang hari ini tampak cukup berbeda. Senyuman sumringah menghiasi rupa sambil sepasang netra berpendar ke segala arah; bermaksud menyapa tiap-tiap kembang yang bertemu pandang dengan manik kembar sewarna danau kelam kepunyaan Senjakala Merindu.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

665 ㅡ Sudah kuasai sebuah kelebihan kecil.

Hari terakhir bercocok tanam menjadi hari yang paling menyenangkan bagi Senjakala Merindu. Entahlah apabila di masa mendatang ia akan merindukan aktivitas menenangkan ini atau tidak. Namun, satu hal yang pasti—Senjakala sudah kuasai sebuah kelebihan kecil. Kelak ia yakin mampu berbangga hati mengatakan kepada kakaknya, Surinala Melati, bahwasanya ia berhasil sabar menanam kembang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

664 ㅡ Seakan sedang memeluk seseorang.

Menghela napas perlahan-lahan, "Aku rindu ayahku." Apabila biasanya Senjakala akan melipat surat pertanyaan, kali ini sang juita memilih untuk mendekap secarik kertas tersebut seakan sedang memeluk seseorang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

663 ㅡ Ya seperti sangat aman dan nyaman.

"Mhm," berdeham sejemang guna merangkai jawaban dalam benak terlebih dahulu. "Aku tidak akan melupakan betapa hangatnya tangan mendiang ayahku ketika beliau menggenggam tanganku. Jikalau ditanya seperti apa rasanya; ya seperti sangat aman dan nyaman, seolah-olah Ayah tidak akan melepasku sampai kapan pun," kata Senjakala dengan teramat lugas.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

662 ㅡ Tidak, aku tidak apa-apa.

"Tidak," dan menolak Senjakala menerima kalau hati mendadak sedih dibuat untaian kta yang barusan dibaca. "Aku tidak apa-apa," lantas terucap sebagai pengingat.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

661 ㅡ Nyaris betul bulir air membasahi kelopak mata.

Biasanya Senjakala Merindu akan menjadi teramat murka dengan tanda tanya yang kerap muncul di kepala, pula di surat dalam genggaman. Namun, kali ini justru sebaliknya. Nyaris betul bulir air membasahi tirai kelopak mata; pertanda sang empunya netra sedang dirundung gelisah yang membabi buta.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

660 ㅡ Sepucuk surat berisi tanya atau titah.

Lekaslah sepasang ain terbuka sempurna kala sepucuk surat berisi tanya atau titah usai berada dalam genggaman. Mengangguk pelan-pelan dalam usaha merespons serebrum yang bekerja dengan giat.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

659 ㅡ Terlahir untuk memberi sentuhan pada kembang.

Maka dari itu, dalam hitungan detik saja, kedua tangan cekatan milik Senjakala Merindu usai melakukan tugasnya. Menaruh bibit hingga menyirami tanah gembur dengan air; semua dikerjakan dalam sekali gerakan seolah-olah sang juita memang terlahir untuk memberi sentuhan-sentuhan kecil pada kembang-kembang yang ada.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

658 ㅡ Agaknya cuaca hari ini sedang tak beres.

Tiada rasa sebal di dada, sebab Senjakala Merindu berencana langsung menanam kembang dan berakhir menjawab pertanyaan tanpa menunggu lama-lama. Agaknya cuaca hari ini sedang tak beres, sehingga malas betul apabila harus membuang waktu yang bisa digunakan untuk istirahat demi bercocok tanam di rumah kaca.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

657 ㅡ Bangga dengan diriku yang pantang menyerah.

Malas menerangkan, maka akhir kata Senjakala Merindu menambahkan, "Aku bangga dengan diriku yang pantang menyerah."

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

656 ㅡ Entahlah, entah akan sampai kapan.

Geleng-geleng, tetapi pada akhirnya Senjakala Merindu memutuskan untuk benar-benar menjawab. Satu tarikan napas diambil sebelum mulai merangkai aksara.

"Aku suka dan bangga dengan caraku memandang dunia," katanya lugas. "Bagaimana menjelaskannya, ya? Intinya aku sudah mengenal diriku sendiri hingga rasanya dunia tak sekejam yang aku bayangkan," walakin sang juita kerap kali masih menjadi bahan guyonan semesta. Entahlah, entah akan sampai kapan.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

655 ㅡ Apa yang tidak bisa aku banggakan dari diriku.

"Jujur akan lebih mudah menjawab jikalau pertanyaanya lebih ke arah; apa saja hal-hal yang tidak bisa aku banggakan dari diriku," kemudian Senjakala Merindu tertawa pelan, "tetapi kenyataannya aku diminta mengumbar kelebihanku. Sial, ini sangat sulit."

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

654 ㅡ Akhirnya labium melantunkan sopran khas.

"Pertanyaan yang menarik," komentarnya dengan esem tipis terlukis pada rupa ayu sang nona.

Mengambil momen untuk sebentar berpikir, Senjakala termenung. Namun, tak selang berapa lama, akhirnya labium melantunkan sopran khas kepunyaan ratna personifikasi senja penuh kerinduan ini.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

653 ㅡ Manik kembar digunakan untuk membaca.

Kembang dalam kuasa ditanam dengan rapi. Lihai betul kedua tangan Senjakala Merindu menempatkan kembang kelima di pot berbeda. Tanpa banyak berkomentar lebih jauh, manik kembar digunakan untuk terang-terangan membaca tiap-tiap rajutan kata di dalam secarik kertas dekat si kembang. Sejemang saja diserap kalimat yang barusan tertangkap pandang sebelum dilipat kembali perkamen itu untuk kemudian ditinggalkan tepat di samping kembang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

652 ㅡ Apa yang dimulai harus diselesaikan.

Kendati hati hendak menyudahi semua sampai di sini, langkah sebal masih dibawa dengan berani. Apa yang telah dimulai harus diselesaikan dengan baik-baik. Setidaknya hari ini serebrum cukup aktif menentukan keputusan.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

651 ㅡ Apa aku berhenti saja melakukan ini?

"Apa aku berhenti saja melakukan ini?" terlontar dari birai ranum kala sepasang tungkai bergantian memijak permukaan bumi guna menyambangi rumah kaca.

Sedari tadi labium tak letih-letih berkomentar ihwal misi yang perlu dikerjakan hingga tujuh hari tanpa henti. Iya, apa lagi kalau bukan misi bercocok tanam.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

650 ㅡ Kembang usai duduk apik di singgasana baru.

Terombang-ambing perahu yang dinakhodai Senjakala Merindu, maka lekas saja berupaya menyudahi kegiatan bercocok tanam hari ini. Kembang usai duduk apik di singgasana baru, pun pertanyaan telah dihadiahkan jawaban langsung dari labium. Enggan ambil pusing, tanpa ba-bi-bu raga lantas meninggalkan rumah kaca untuk pergi istirahat.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

649 ㅡ Alih-alih meratapi nasib.

Alih-alih meratapi nasib, Senjakala Merindu justru tertawa terpingkal-pingkal dibuat memori yang sekonyong-konyong hadir memenuhi pikiran bak tengah menonton sinema rendahan.

"Iya, karena sehabis itu," dengus sebal dibiarkan lolos, "ibuku diturunkan dari jabatan dan kehilangan pekerjaan. Semua disebabkan olehku yang memutuskan untuk membuka mulut."

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

648 ㅡ Adalah salah satu perbuatan paling berani.

"Mengarahkan jari telunjuk ke ibuku saat aku menjadi saksi di pengadilan," dan jeda diberikan sejenak sebelum Senjakala Merindu kembali melanjutkan, "adalah salah satu perbuatan paling berani yang pernah aku lakukan seumur hidupku."

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

647 ㅡ Sukma yang bersembunyi di dasar samudra.

Secarik kertas dicabut dari dekat kembang. Seluruh atensi lekas mendarat pada deret aksara di sana. Tanda tanya timbul memenuhi serebrum, mempertanyakan seberapa kenal Senjakala Merindu dengan sukma yang bersembunyi di dasar samudra.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

646 ㅡ Menyuarakan hati bangga pada evolusi pribadi.

Kuasa sekarang sudah lihai dalam melakukan aktivitas bercocok tanam. Hanya butuh sepersekian sekon saja bagi Senjakala Merindu untuk akhirnya selesai menanam kembang keempat. Esem terukir kecil di rupa mungil, menyuarakan hati yang bangga pada evolusi pribadi.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

645 ㅡ Menyuruh diam jantung yang bergelora.

"Tenang," dan diusap dada untuk menyuruh diam jantung yang bergelora tanpa alasan. "Jangan berisik," lalu sisi pelipis kini diusap perlahan-lahan seolah-olah meminta pikiran untuk berhenti membuat gaduh barang sejemang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

644 ㅡ Entahlah, masih menjadi rahasia semesta.

Bersimpuh di hadapan kembang keempat, nona bersurai cokelat susu tampak sungguh murung dengan raut muka mendung terpampang kentara di kanvas roman. Ada apa gerangan dengan suasana hati Senjakala hari ini? Entahlah, masih menjadi rahasia semesta yang belum mampu dipecahkan oleh siapa pun juga. 

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

643 ㅡ Segala-galanya terasa sia-sia belaka.

Segala-galanya terasa sia-sia belaka. Jikalau diperkenankan berucap kata jujur dari hati, Senjakala Merindu punya harapan untuk mampu maju selangkah lebih jauh demi mengenal diri sendiri sesudah menelinga akan ada misi mudah datang menghampiri. Namun, belum berhasil menemui akhir, sang ratna telah kelabakan bukan main.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

642 ㅡ Helaan napas diloloskan cuma-cuma.

Lesu betul raga mungil kala bertandang kembali ke rumah kaca. Helaan napas diloloskan cuma-cuma, netra tak sama sekali memunculkan binar tiada tara.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

641 ㅡ Malas, apalah gunanya merawat kembang?

Letih, entah sudah berapa kali kehendak ingin berhenti melakukan aktivitas menanam kembang ini mencapai titik tertinggi. Malas, apalah gunanya merawat kembang apabila batin sendiri menolak untuk berbagi kasih.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

640 ㅡ Setiap dari kita berhak terbahak-bahak.

Siapa pun yang menelinga cuap-cuap Senjakala ihwal kehidupannya dipersilakan tertawa terpingkal-pingkal. Setiap dari kita berhak terbahak-bahak. Senjakala telah terbiasa menjadi lelucon untuk semesta, maka tertawalah.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

639 ㅡ Hasil menggembirakan untuk Surinala Melati.

Siapa sangka Senjakala Merindu mampu meluapkan kisah masa lalu yang tersimpan apik di samudra hati terdalam setenang ini? Barangkali rutinitas sang juita mengunjungi psikiater membuahkan hasil yang pastinya menggembirakan untuk Surinala Melati. Iya, Surinala Melati, juita teramat jelita yang tak lain dan tak bukan adalah keluarga satu-satunya bagi Senjakala Merindu, yakni saudari tersayang.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

638 ㅡ Haha, hidupku lucu, 'kan?

"Suatu hari di pertengahan bulan April di tahun 2012, aku melihat ibuku bercinta dengan seorang rekan kerja mendiang ayahku," cerita Senjakala dalam sopran berdesibel rendah. "Setelah kejadian itu, aku bisu tujuh bulan. Semua terjadi begitu cepat, tetapi juga terasa lambat di waktu yang sama. Saat bulan November datang, tiba-tiba saja ibuku yang bekerja sebagai jaksa diturunkan dari jabatan. Aku lantas tidak lagi punya sosok ibu yang bisa aku banggakan karena ibuku kabur ke Singapura bersama seorang hakim yang adalah rekan kerja mendiang ayahku. Selingkuhan ibuku itu hakim. Bisa-bisanya mereka berzinah di depan mataku. Haha, hidupku lucu, 'kan?"

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

637 ㅡ Tidak berapi-api, agak lain dari biasanya.

Awalnya enggan bercerita entah kepada siapa, tetapi pada akhirnya ia membuka suara juga. Ditarik napas dalam-dalam sebelum diembuskan perlahan-lahan. Sejemang termenung, tetapi sepersekian sekon kemudian Senjakala Merindu melantunkan sopran merdu. Tidak berapi-api, agak lain dari biasanya.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

636 ㅡ Serebrum mencerna maksud mata memindai aksara.

Sesudah membangun singgasana baru untuk kembang ketiga, dibacalah satu kalimat pertanyaan yang barangkali dianggap sederhana namun sangat berhasil membuat leher tercekat dan lidah kelu. Perempatan imajiner hadir sebagai reaksi awal setelah serebrum mulai mencerna maksud mata memindai aksara.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.

635 ㅡ Jantung berdebar tak keruan, napas tersengal.

Alih-alih malas berbenah untuk menyiapkan bahan bercocok tanam, hari ini entah mengapa Senjakala justru cemas ihwal pertanyaan yang akan dilihat mata kala sepucuk surut di samping kembang tertangkap pandang. Jantung berdebar tak keruan, napas pun ikut tersengal.

Salam hangat,

Senjakala.